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January 28, 2016
bitsofthepast

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Women Who Make a Difference

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Last week I attended a funeral of a woman who was a long time member of our congregation.  She was an amazing woman who died in her mid nineties, and made a huge impact on all she came into contact with.  Did she do huge things?  Well, in a way she did, but to the general world, she probably lived an average life.  To those that loved her, she was a hero.

She loved her step grandchildren as if they were her blood.  She loved a sister who was considered different in the 1950’s and supported her and her wife in the midst of prejudice.  She was considered a mom to all who had none.  She made everyone laugh.  She was always ready to tell a joke, and she loved chocolate.

What struck me while I was listening to those tell stories of how she loved unconditionally, it struck me yet again, how those who make a difference are those who love with their whole heart.  She was not outspoken, she spoke with love.  All who knew her, knew they were accepted no matter what.

Those are the difference makers.  Many can speak with a loud voice, but how many speak with quiet actions?  Those who choose to, are heroes.

Thank you for making this world a better place.

Love,

Suzy

January 27, 2016
bitsofthepast

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Oldest Bit

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Our homeschooling year is going well.  The kids have been attending an online school, and they have loved it.  The school has been challenging, yet it is so nice to be able to complete assignments at their own speed.  Yes, they have to complete a certain amount by the end of the week, but there is no time limit during the day for them to get it done, and this truly helps, especially with the different learning styles my kids have.

Oldest Bit has learned a great deal about himself this year.  He has blossomed through all the activities that he has been a part of.  In co-op, he has learned that public speaking is not so scary.  He has played his banjo in front of a large group of people.  He is excelling at basketball.  And even though he has a teenager attitude, he still gives me hugs and tells me he loves me.  How absolutely wonderful.  I cannot believe how fast he is growing up, but I have had so much fun watching him mature and come into his own.

But the child cannot take a normal picture!  Every time I was about to click a photo, he would change his face!  Drove me crazy!

Oh, I love you Oldest Bit!  Please time, go a little bit slower!

Love,

Suzy

January 26, 2016
bitsofthepast

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A Dog

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Our dear little Chewy passed away recently, and our house has been heartbroken.  He was such a good dog, and the first dog to join our family almost 16 years ago.  I remember the day Chewy was born.  It was Easter day at my grandma’s house, and my aunt had a Chihuahua that was tremendously spoiled.  her name was Stinkerbell, and that pretty much fit her.  She went into labor while we enjoyed Easter dinner, and I was truly amazed at how many little puppies fit into a Chihuahua.  I pretty sure there were at least five.  Mr. Bit and I were still dating, and knew by that point that we would be engaged sometime, but a dog was hardly on our radar, especially a Chihuahua.  I was never a small dog fan.

My aunt had other plans however.  Many years before Chewy was born, I helped take care of her after she suffered an aneurism. I went back to Oklahoma and helped the family care for her, and she remembered that.  She really wanted me to have one of the puppies, and so Mr. Bits and I agreed.  I remember when we went to pick him up.  We met the family for my grandma’s birthday to go fishing.  When we went down to the lake, we saw a small puppy with a very large stick in his mouth trying to run.  I thought to myself, “A small dog who thinks he is so big…perfect compromise.”  We quickly fell in love with the little Chihuahua.

Since then, we have been married and added three children to our family, all of which fell in love with him, and whom he loved back.  The house is quiet now, and the kids have been very sad.  We have told stories daily about how funny he was, and how great it was to have an amazing dog.

He is buried under the treehouse in the backyard, and Oldest Bit is planning to use his wood burning kit to burn his name into the tree stump that sits on top of where his is buried.

Funny how such a small dog, made such a huge impact on our family.  He will always be remembered fondly by all who knew him.

Love you Chewy!

 

January 6, 2016
bitsofthepast

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The Return of Women Who Make A Difference

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Next week, I will be starting the series of Women who Make a Difference.  This series will be every Wednesday and it will highlight women who live out their calling every day.

One thing I want to make clear is that a calling might not be what you think it is.  We tend to think on a grandiose scheme.  We forget that what we do every day, the tedious things, the “small” things add up to make huge impacts on ourselves, kids, husbands, families, communities, an eventually the world.

In the past I have highlighted all my grandmothers.  They truly lived, and are still living,  simple lives in which small things made huge impacts on so many around them.  Calling of making quilts, to cooking, to teaching the fine art of yard sales.

I have some wonderful women lined up to highlight in the upcoming weeks, but would also love suggestions that you may have.  One thing I am changing, is that I would like to interview the women and ask questions as to why they started, how they keep going etc.  If the woman is no longer with us, please give details as to how they made a difference in your life.

I am truly excited to be doing this again.  I hope it will bring inspiration and encouragement to so many of you.

Love,

Suzy

January 5, 2016
bitsofthepast

7 comments

Anyone Else?

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Anyone else ever feel like they just don’t measure up?  Last night, was a hard night for me.  I was reminded of former friends whom I no longer keep in touch with.  Not for lack of trying, I have tried to make amends.  In many cases, I even know what I have done wrong.  In some I do not even begin to know.  Thankfully, those that I know what I have done, we have made amends but unfortunately our friendship will never be the same.  It was not all just me, I know this.  It was two young people trying to make sense of hurts, disappointments and expectations we all put on friendships.  Then their are those whom I have no idea what went wrong, have tried to make amends, but they have been cruel and have told me that I am basically not worth the effort.  These are hurtful and truly affect the way I think of myself.

I have never had an easy time of making friends.  When I was younger, I was picked on quite a bit.  I had horrible teeth, played the violin and was not known for being pretty in any way possible.  Awkward is a good word for it.  As I grew up, I chose any group I fit in with and I became a tribe floater.  I was so scared of making someone mad, or having them realize that I was not worth it, that I refused to get too close to anyone.  This ended up hurting me anyway, as I felt as if I was better friends with some, and they would inform me that I was not.

This mess has carried into my adult life, and has been difficult even in marriage.  I have been known to push Mr. Bits away, just to make sure he doesn’t dislike who I “really” am.  Thankfully, he is amazing and has shown to me on several occasions that this is not the case at all.  He knows all about me and still loves me tremendously.  This mess is definitely in my friendships, as I am terrified that I will make someone upset. I worked for years as a teacher, and felt sorely misunderstood by many people.  I felt like my character was flawed and they must be perfect because everyone seems to like them.  I know this is not the case with all of my coworkers, but when one feels that way, in my mind, all do.  I feel this way in church.  I feel this way in whatever I choose to occupy my time.

It is a constant battle.  A constant change in my own thinking to remind myself that we all must feel this way on some level.  I remind myself that I do have people who love me, faults and all. That we all, every human being in this world, has faults.  Every human has something that makes them difficult to get along with.  And Most days, these thoughts prevail.  But there are some days, when I feel utterly alone and lost.  What is wrong with me?  Why do I have no one who cares?  The all or nothing mindset of depression.  Then I remember that I had to stop therapy for a couple of months due to an overbooked schedule.  That this is a new year, and all the craziness of the old year is still fresh.  Time to reschedule.

Today is a hard day.  I really do not know why I am choosing to share this information with you all, except for the fact that I really do want to be real and honest.  I am not looking for people to baby me, but I do want to know I am not alone.

Do others ever feel this way?  Do others ever have these bad days?

Thank you for letting me share my thoughts today.

Love,

Suzy

January 5, 2016
bitsofthepast

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Back in the Swing

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Oh the New Year!  Always a slam back into the swing of things.  Last night, there was an overriding grumpiness that seemed to hover over the family.  Back to work, back to school.

But I feel as though we allowed Christmas to linger this year.  We let ourselves rest and enjoy the season, which is something we tend not to do. Rush to get from one thing to another.  Rush to get the shopping done.  So I think our grumpiness came from the thought that we would have to rush.

We learned something this Christmas, and that was we do not have to rush.  Each day, no matter how busy it may be, can be savored and we can be in whatever moment we are in with all our hearts.

Today was our first day back to co-op, and even though we all love it, last night I was rushing around trying to get things done.  It hit me that I was not enjoying my time.  I was not savoring the moment of getting ready for the task, for the smiles on my kids faces when we go.  I was just thinking of what needed to be done.  It was up to me to change my outlook.  And isn’t that what I need to do with all the craziness of what I choose to do with my time.  It includes this blog.  I have not been enjoying my time, but instead seeing it as something I have to do.  I realized today that I am going to have more fun with this space.  I want it to be a place for family, friends and strangers to all feel at home and welcome.  I want to thank those of you who read this small space, thank you for caring about my family.

Welcome New Year, and welcome a new change in attitude.  Not necessarily a resolution, more like a life change.

Happy New Year!

Love,

Suzy

December 30, 2015
bitsofthepast

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Here’s to Snow!

Considering we had one snow storm last year, and this state relies on skiing, I think we are doing pretty good!

Regardless of how much shoveling we have done, I am pretty darn happy to see the area covered in white.  Especially around this time of year.  Ask me if I still like it in March and I will have a different response!

Stay safe and have a wonderful day everyone!

Love,

Suzy

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